Sunday, December 2

What is your favorite thing about being married, and the hardest thing about it?

This is kind of a hard one because there are so many things.  First up are my favorites.  There is nothing better than having your bestfriend around ALL the time who you can do everything with.  Being married, you know literally everything about each other and D and I have zero secrets, so when anything happens, I cannot wait to tell him!  I love not having any boundries. (including getting down to the nitty gritty.  Ew, I went there.)  On a serious note though, having no boundries enables a couple to truly become one in a sense which does wonders on the relationship.  I love marriage because everything it has taught me.  Nothing is about "I" anymore, it's about "we".  Becoming a team has made bearing trials so much easier, it has taught me to become more selfless, and lastly, it has taught me a lot about communication and how to work with and react toward others.  What I have learned from marriage has carried on into all other areas of my life including work, school, and every day life.

The hardest thing about marriage?  I feel that D and I have had an amazing marriage so far so we haven't had many hard times.  I would say the hardest thing about marriage is getting used to each other and managing other's expecations.  During the first year or so of marriage, you really have to get used not only to one another but also each other's families and friends.  When you hitch two people who obviously grew up in two different households with sometimes very different traditions and ways of living, some problems may arise.  Dall and I didn't really have to deal with this ourselves but I have seen it greatly affect some people we know.  The hardest thing for Dall and I is communicating and managing each other's expectations well.  Any disagreement or agrument we've ever had has been because of this.  It's extremely frustrating for both of us when we set our expectations according to the conversation we had but both of us understood it differently.

Are you trying to have kids?

Yes, we surely are.  We got the go ahead from Heavenly Father to start trying.  It has been about 4 months since I got my birth control taken out and there is still no baby growing inside me.  At this point, it's going to happen when it happens.  It's all in the Lord's hands now so we'll be excited when the time comes for us to become parents!

If friendship and loyalty is so important to you, then how could you betray and hurt such a close friend of yours?

Well, there is only one situation that comes to mind when reading this question.  I don't know if I have shared D and I's full story on here or not.  Either way, I'll do a quick recap.

I met Dall for the first time when I was in 9th grade during Christmas break.  I had a disgustingly huge crush on him but with him being in 11th grade, I was "too young for him."  My heart was broken but life went on.  My bestfriend, Dall, and I became bestfriends for awhile and hung out a lot.  This was the case until we started hanging out with Dall's group of friends. (8 of the coolest boys you'll ever meet)  When I was a sophomore, I started dating one of Dall's friends and Dall and my bestfriend started dating.  This was the case all the way through the boys' senior year.  Inevitably, we both broke up later on.  Things got quite rough because after my bestfriend and Dall broke up before his mission, I continued talking and hanging out with Dallin.  First bad move on my part. We were just really close friends but I will admit I had a crush on him (look at him, how couldn't I?) but of course, that's not how the relationship was protrayed. 

He went on his mission and everything was fine throughout most of it.  It wasn't until toward the end of his mission that things went south between my bestfriend and I.  Between rumors and miscommunication, everything became a huge mess.  I was of course outrageously stressed so I wanted to make sure that when he got home I didn't step on any toes.  One bad thing led to another and this is not what took place.  Everything that could have went wrong did.  Second, third, and fourth bad move on my part.  Luck was most definitely not on my side at this point in time.  To end the story, Dall and I then dated, got engaged, and then got married all within that year.  It was one of the hardest things to not have my best friend and her family come to our wedding but I couldn't really expect them to.  It was a hard situation for everyone involved and no matter what happened, someone would get hurt, I'm just sorry the most harm was caused by me.

So, to answer your question, friendship and loyalty is extremely important to me.  I never ever want to do anything to hurt or cause grief or pain to someone else.  Of course no one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes.  I made some big ones.  This particualr situation was a rough one all the way around.  I was in a very tough spot and things panned out in the worst way possible.  I still feel bad to this day for how everything happened but it was never my intention.  When it came to point of marrying Dallin, it was the right thing to do and I knew we were suppose to get married.  I spent many nights bawling my eyes out for the pain I had caused those who were close to me.  As far as my knowledge is concerned today, I have made the appropriate apologies and have tried to fix the wrongs I've done.  I will continue to pray for those that I have wronged, and the rest is between them and the Lord.

Well, I'm sure glad I only had three questions because I apparently like to write novels in return.  I have now decided however, that I will most likely not be publishing anonymous comments anymore.  I think everyone's opinion is important so why not take credit for it?  I don't mind if you speak your mind whether it be positive or negative, so feel free to do so, just take credit for your brilliance!


  1. I love and admire your honesty and openess, and am sure glad you two ended up together :) you are bound to make the most beautiful babies ever!

  2. i have heard of so many people who are having a hard time getting pregs & it breaks my heart. as paranoid as i am of getting pregnant i'm even more paranoid of the fact of not getting preggers when the time comes. luckily though its the lords will and his timing. i love the peace of knowing that everything will work out and that there is a plan. im so happy for you & dal you guys will make great parents and gorgeous babes.

    and as for the story about your friend. your voice echos of humility and kindness. anyone in that situation would have been "stepping on toes" but when it comes down to it, love is love and you cant stop it no matter how hard you try. haha so hell to all the haters.

    loved this post cait. & now i have written the longest "comment" in blogger history. im perfectly ok with it.


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